Seven ~ When Good Goes Stale

We something that we must have and do whatever we have to do to get it.  Now we have it, its ours!  It's so cool and awesome and I am so happy now that I have it.  But how long does that last?  We love it until we lose interest and then there it is.  And eventually we find something else.  We get used to things, that billboard that never changes that you pass on your way to work.  Do you actually hear the birds chirping outside?  Do you see the clouds rolling by?  We are desensitized to the world around us, and the only way to re-sensitize ourselves, is to make a conscious effort to remain focused and to tune into the good in our lives.

How much effort goes into learning how to appreciate wine?  People take wine appreciation courses, just to learn how to appreciate a simple beverage.  Just like people who learn how to appreciate wine become wine connoisseurs, we can become LIFE connoisseurs.  We can learn to appreciate every experience, every possession, every relationship, just by making a conscious effort to focus on appreciating what we have whilst we are participating in enjoying it.

Pick one of the following:

1.  An experience (eating an apple)
2.  A possession (your bed)
3.  A relationship (your best friend)

Now try and become a connoisseur of the thing you have chosen for the day.

Let's say you chose your bed.... notice how the blankets feel on your body, how the pillow holds your head, how your sheets feel and smell.

Wouldn't it be great if we could look at life through the eyes of an artist?  - see all the details, textures, shades, lighting?   Let's look at a tree through the eyes of an artist.  How would you draw it?  If we can master the technique of being a connoisseur of life then we will be able to experience heightened levels of pleasure in our relationships, career and life.  Simultaneously we will succeed in developing our creativity, "out-of-the-box" thinking ability, and optimism.  Go on...

Warren, S. 2010, 7 Ancient Keys To Happiness, CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform

Six ~ First Stop (and Key #1)

Day five was about starting the cruise and the questions were designed to make you think.

1.  What does happiness mean to you?
2.  Write down 3 ways your life would be different if you lived in a state of happiness.

These questions were supposed to make you look at what you think would make you happy.  If you were able to achieve happiness, would you be truly happy?  "When trying to define what happiness means to us, we would be wise to project into the future and think deeply.  If we can envisage ourselves living our lives according to our definition and having a feeling of complete satisfaction and bliss ~ then our definition is probably a good one.  Before we shoot for the stars, its good to know which star we are trying to reach."  (Warren, 2010, p532  KV)


If we can think of three tangible ways that improving our levels of happiness will enhance our lives, we will automatically start to focus on being happy and our lives will become better - without doing anything.  It's an amazingly powerful tool.  Just using our imagination to dream of a better life, sets the wheels in motion for us to have a better life.

When we're done with this journey, it will be awesome to come back to this day and see how much our lives have changed.  We may be pleasantly surprised to discover that our lives have improved dramatically especially in the three ways we have identified in this exercise.

Let's move on now...

Key #1 ~ See the Good

Its time for the first of the 7 Ancient Keys to Happiness!!  Since happiness is a choice, we can choose to live happy lives by learning to see what's so good about life.  We can train ourselves to see the cup as half full, not half empty and to see the silver lining behind every cloud.  Accustoming ourselves to stop, notice, appreciate and even smell the roses, makes life more pleasant.  This is the first and most important of the Ancient Keys to Happiness.  Seeing the good in everything is the skeleton key that opens all doors.  Every block we have in our lives is due to not being able to see the good that lies within the situation.  once we learn the art of extracting the good from every experience, situation, person or interaction we will find we are able to sail smoothly and happily through life - wherever life happens to lead us.

The first stop in the journey of life towards bliss and happiness is to know how to recognize the goodness and sweetness that already exists in our lives.  We have some situations that don't look "pretty" but even then we can still learn to enjoy them.  These situations are more like oysters than roses.  Many things in life are like oysters, they may look hard and cold on the outside, disgusting and smelly on the inside, but in fact there are pearls of magnificent beauty contained wihtin them.  When we train ourselves to search for the pearls and cast aside the oyster, in every part of our lives we will be on the way to true happiness.

...Monday morning, alarm goes off,  immediately you realize how much you hate Mondays, why do I have to go to that job?  Why can't I do something else?  

OYSTERS... where is the pearl?

What would life be like if I couldn't get out of bed?  What if I didn't have an awful job to go to?  What if I was fired?    As you realize all of these things, you slowly get dressed....  What if I didn't have shoes to put on?  What if I didn't have feet?   All of our thoughts can be shifted at any time, we just need to choose to do so.  

It's not what we've got, but how much we focus on enjoying what we have that will bring happiness.  It is completely irrelevant whether other people also have what we have as to whether we are enjoying ourselves or not.   The more intensely we can focus on the good things that we are currently enjoying, the happier we become.  

Let's tune into seeing the beautiful roses that are in our lives.  Sit down for 15 minutes and write down a list of all the good things you have.  These may fit into the following categories:

1.  Physical - head, nose, mouth, clothes, shoes, car

2.  People - friends, family, acquaintances

3.  Emotional - an appreciation of music, ability to feel emotions

See if you can add 5 new ones to each of the categories each day for the next week!

This exercise helps build your positive thinking muscle.  Writing, prioritizing and appreciating is training ourselves to notice the good things.  Awareness.  The things we concentrate on happen more often.  The more we notice and appreciate how many material blessings we have the more they will increase.  if we notice and appreciate those that we love then our love for them will increase.  If we notice and appreciate the good in ourselves then that part will naturally begin to shine forth more.

Warren, S. 2010, 7 Ancient Keys To Happiness, CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform

Five ~ Starting the Cruise

Before we start on the journey towards the City of Happiness together we need to make sure we're all looking at the same map, and all heading in the same direction.

- "I think happiness is a state of complete euphoria, like living on cloud 9 constantly."

- "I think happiness is a quiet soft feeling of contentment."

- "I think happiness is the thrill of wild excitement running through your veins constantly."

If we are aiming for a state called "Happiness" we need to know what it is we think we are trying to achieve. In order to reach this goal of inner-bliss we are going to be learning lots of new, exciting and interesting information and tools. . (Warren, 2010, p496-512  KV)

By now, I am hoping that you've found (or went out and purchased) a notebook or notepad to jot down the exercises that we have been doing.  At the end of each lesson, there is a "your turn" section.  If you don't have something dedicated to this portion, today is the day to make that happen.  We have 85 more days to go and its time to get serious.  Keeping everything in one spot makes it easy to refer back to and you will always know where you are.

Write down what you want.   What does happiness mean to YOU?  Not your spouse/significant other, not your kids, not your friend, YOU.

Will these desires actually make  you happy once you've reached them?  Maybe you need to adjust your desires.  Maybe you're heading down the wrong path.    It will be interesting to see how our views change once we begin our journey.  If your path changes as we go, its ok.  The goal is to listen to that quiet voice.  What is that voice telling you?  

1.  What does Happiness mean to you?

2.  Write down 3 ways your life would be different if you lived in a state of happiness?

Warren, S. 2010, 7 Ancient Keys To Happiness, CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform

Four ~ Two are Better Than One

 "Now I'm going to take you on a journey to true bliss.  On the journey, reflect and ask yourself   "Is this true?" and if it is, then ask yourself, "What should be done with this information?" and wait to hear a quiet answer." (Warren, 2010, p439  KV)

 The first step in navigating towards a more blissful existence is to learn to make good friends... and keep them.  Who is a good friend?  Ask your quiet voice.

A good friend will guide us, support us, encourage us, inspire us and love us!

A true friend sticks by you no matter what.  A friend isn't a friend because of the things we give them.  A good friend is a giver not a taker.  Friends make everything better, deeper, more beautiful.  This book is best when shared with a friend.  Welcome, friend!

Maybe you're coming to realize that you have lots of friends, but they are only around when they need something from you.  Maybe they aren't really friends afterall.  It's time to get some good friends, the ones that will love you.

Do you have a friend that you want to share this walk with?  Invite them!  The more the merrier. 

1.  Get quiet and ask yourself "Who would make a good lifelong friend?"

2.  See if they'd like to join you for this adventure towards inner bliss.

Go on..

Warren, S. 2010, 7 Ancient Keys To Happiness, CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform

Three ~ Keeping in Touch

"I found it,"  Kate said, "I listened for a few days, and finally I heard it.  I have a problem though - I don't want to do what it said.  It tells me to be responsible and I want to be carefree.  It tells me to tell the truth, when I want to tell a little white lie - it's a pest!"

Have you found that quiet voice deep inside?  Is it a pest?  Is it stealing your fun?  It is part of the process.  Sometimes the things it tells us to do are inconvenient.  The more time you spend listening to this inner voice, the sooner you will see that it isn't there to take away our fun.  That voice is there to point us in the right direction, to help us achieve things that will bring us true happiness.  When we fail at something, this is not the voice that is telling you "I told you it was too hard for you."  Our inner voice says "Wow!  You did great, you should try again."

Warren states "If our quiet voice tells us we should set up an institution for disable people, we don't have to feel bad if we don't go out and do it... If the quiet voice is persistent with grand desires - then we should follow the path that will lead us there.  However, we may find that we will reach a point of satisfaction and not desire to follow through with our original grandiose plans (e.g. of setting up an institute for disable people)  If we are doing small acts that are similar to our original plan e.g. helping a disabled person once a week, we may notice that we no longer desire to set up that institute.  Why?  Because the quiet voice's grand plans are sometimes wil fantasies based on an unfulfilled need we have deep inside... Once we start feeding our deep needs, we may find that our original grand plans become sidelined.  But, we should never sell ourselves short, if our quiet voice really craves for us to set up an institution - then eventually, step by step - we'll get there.  We just need to keep asking the quiet voice what to do next, keep up the dialogue and keep listening."

Today I will try to take one step towards:    (write it down)

If we have worked hard and taught ourselves how to access our dep wisdom then we are completely foolish to ignore its good advice.   Success is not achieved over night.  Success also isn't always measured by achieving our original dream or goal - but success IS being able to make and appreciate the small steps needed in order to reach our goal.  Success is when we get up from a fall and try again.  Success is when we beat that part of ourselves that wants to give up and resign itself to mediocrity.  Success is when we keep dreaming, hoping and planning for a better future (whilst simultaneously appreciating all that we have right now.) (Warren, 2010, p422  KV)

Get up, dust off those dreams, reflect deeply on what you really want out of life and who you really want to be and step forward TODAY.

Warren, S. 2010, 7 Ancient Keys To Happiness, CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform

Two ~ Learning to Listen

Yesterday we took a moment to ourselves to try to find that inner voice.  Today we touch bases again and learn to listen.


How did it go yesterday?  Were you able to find your voice?  With all of the holiday noise going on, I struggled a little.  It seems that there is always something to do and even when its quiet, the noise in my head is so loud.  I was able to escape into a quiet inner moment and my inner voice was so happy to see me.   I could literally feel the joy inside.

Learning to Listen

..."Money, power and prestige are not synonymous with happiness.  (what?!?!?)  However, as we all know - it doesn't mean we live in bliss if we DON'T have them, but it also doesn't mean we ARE happy if we DO have them - they don't bring us lasting happiness ON THEIR OWN.  Money, power and prestige are like cars that we can use to drive us towards happiness.  But if we are just driving around, not knowing where we are supposed to be going then we won't arrive at our destination, and we might get very frustrated and lost.  It is a bit ointless spending all our time and effor in upgrading and improving our cars, without actually knowing where we are planning to drive them.

By learning to listen to our inner voice, we'll be turning on the GPS navigation system in our car.  Our deep reflective quiet voice will lead us towards happiness.  Listening to our quiet voice is not escaping into our thoughts; it is bringing our thoughts out into the open.  The quiet voice is always there, and is talking to us - we just need to tune in and it will guide us towards a life of bliss."  (Warren, 2010, p 333 KV)

 Steal a quiet moment today and find your inner voice.  "What can I do today to increase the levels of joy I feel in my life?"  now wait...

Write down your answer!

This is about learning to listen.    We really do know what we need, if we can take time to listen.  

"In order to develop our creativity and ability to think outside the box of current problems and existence, we need to free our mind from the humdrum routine of life that we constantly preoccupy ourselves with.  When we take the time to teach ourselves to slow down, relax and reflect, we can then start using that amazing gift of our brain to help us.  With deep reflective thought we can actually come up with most of the answers to all of our problems.  So instead of suffering our problems we can use our brain to solve our problems."  (Warren, 2010, p 355 KV)

Today is a brand new day.  Go knock its socks off!  See you tomorrow!

 Warren, S. 2010, 7 Ancient Keys To Happiness, CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform

One ~ Getting in Touch

Today we begin our journey into the 7 Ancient Keys to Happiness.  This is a 90 day guide to achieving inner-bliss.  This book is by S. Warren and is available through Amazon here:

7 Ancient Keys to Happiness

Or here for a FREE Kindle download:

FREE Kindle Version of 7 Ancient Keys to Happiness

The book is divided into 3 main principles:

• SMELL EVERY ROSE - See the good in everything
• CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN - Judge things objectively
• LOVE EVERY DAY - Love yourself

Here we go!

 

Getting in touch

Take a moment to think about your day, start to finish.

• Where did you go?
• What did you do?
• Did you accomplish anything?
• Did you forget something?
• What did you eat?
• ARE YOU HAPPY?

Sit with those questions.  Now focus on the last one.  ARE YOU HAPPY?  Who is answering that question?  Is it the selfish you, or that teeny tiny voice deep down inside that really knows what its talking about?

 We want to get in touch with that little voice inside.  In fact, we want to embrace that little voice and pay close attention to it.  "Tapping into how we think is the beginning of self-knowledge.  Once we understand how we work, we can then manipulate, control and use our inherent awesome powers to have a wonderful life." (Warren, 2010, p 274 KV)

Find a quiet spot, or maybe you are most centered somewhere noisy.  It is a different place for each of us, go there and just be.

Am I happy?

There is only one you.  In order to take better care of yourself you will need to find out who you are and what your needs are.  Warren states " Each person has internal care instructions for themselves hard wired into their personality, which means each person in this world has the ability to find out who they are and how to maximize their potential.  The care instructions are deep within us, embedded in our consciousness, intuition or felt at times of inspiration."

Our first step towards achieving inner bliss is to recognize that we have that deep intuitive self and becoming best friends with our truths.   Reading, hearing, believing are short term commitments.  Take that first step and spend 15 minutes with yourself.

Warren, S. 2010, 7 Ancient Keys To Happiness, CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform

If you have stumbled upon the blog and wish to join us on Facebook for the group portion, we'd love to have you:

1.  LIKE us on Facebook:  Chicken Soup Sandwich Facebook Page

2.  Click on this link to join the event:  Achieving Inner Bliss Event

3.  Click "Join Group" to begin your journey:  Join the Facebook Group

Achieving Inner Bliss

What is it about the last day of the year that stirs something inside of us?  Maybe for you, its the feeling that something big is coming in 2013.  Or maybe you're wondering why people bother getting all excited for the new year.

2013 will be just exactly what you want it to be.  There's so many inspirational quotes...

If you believe it you can achieve it...

Whether you think you can or you can't, you're right...

The list goes on and on.

What is it that you want from 2013?  What did you want from 2012?  Did you get what you wanted?  Are you where you wanted to be?  Was it just another year for you?  Nothing exciting?  Maybe it was amazing... maybe it was the best year of your life.  Or perhaps it was pretty average with a few amazing moments scattered about.  Or did it just plain suck?

I say its time to declare what you want from 2013.  Claim it, proclaim it and lets go get it!

We are starting a movement towards achieving inner bliss.  It is a 90 day  guide presented from the book:

7 Ancient Keys to Happiness by S. Warren

1.  LIKE us on Facebook:  Chicken Soup Sandwich Facebook Page

2.  Click on this link to join the event:    Achieving Inner Bliss Event

3.  Click "Join Group" to begin your journey:  Join the Facebook Group
 
4.  Not a Facebook User?  That's ok... you can participate through our blog:  Chicken Soup Sandwich

Are you a leader?

I am still enjoying the "nuggets of the book "40 Leadership Nuggets of Wisdom to Live By ~ by Stephan Nellas

The only motivation of leading is so that others will be blessed and become leaders themselves. ~ Stephen Nellas

You see it all the time, people that are leaders and no one likes them or respects them.  These leaders generally don't go anywhere.  They are stuck in the same spot forever.  They have employees come and go and they think its because they can't find "good" people.

Reality is, they are not a good leader.  A leader wants to lead people so that they can learn and grow and eventually lead others.  A good leader is likable and personable and makes you feel like they care.  If you can't relate to your team, your team will never be a strong one.  A leader wants his team to aspire to be like him and be remembered no matter where they go.

Are you a leader?  Are you likable?  Do you have a personal relationship with each member of your team.  It is true that there is a line to stay clear of with your team, but you need to know them, know about their families, and know what they like to do for fun outside of work.

If you are to be successful in leading your team has to feel like they can come to you in a time of need and that you will listen.  Does your team trust you or fear you?  Leading by fear will never work.  Your team members are people with their own individual lives outside of the work place.  If you can find a way to respect them individually, they will respect you as well.

Respect fosters trust and accountability.  If your team feels you are committed to them succeeding, they will feel a sense of loyalty and they will want to follow you until you are ready to nurture them into their own leadership. 

You will run into the few people that just want to take from you, but if you are a listener and you are watching your team, you will see it from the start and stop it.  People will be who you want them to be if you are willing to nurture that relationship.  Be the mirror for them to watch and grow.

The success in leadership is in watching your team succeed and grow and build their own team.

Do you value yourself?

Another tidbit from 40 Leadership Nuggets of Wisdom to Live by:

A leader thinks about the welfare of others, but that doesn't mean he fails to think about himself.  ~ Stephen Nellas

A leader loves himself that is why he can afford to love others.  He has a healthy self-love that emanates from his very person.  His self-esteem makes him act confidently in the midst of other people and of other leaders.  He is someone who takes care of himself and does everything that would let him improve as a person and as a leader.  (Nellas, S. I. (2012). 40 Leadership Nuggets of Wisdom to Live By)


If you are to be a leader, you must be able to lead yourself.  If you are not confident in your own abilities then you cannot successfully lead another.  You see it all the time, people are put into a leadership role when they truly are not leaders.  Whatever reason it is that they are put there, perhaps in hopes that they will develop some leadership qualities.

Do you think that you can just plant someone and expect them to grow or should they receive training in order to grow into the position and then be placed there.  I think there are people that are able to learn on the fly, but not everyone is able to do this.  If a person with little leadership ability or experience is put in this position and feels insecure about it, I think they have a great risk of failure.  This isn't good for anyone.

I have found that it is really easy to take care of others.  I can lead if need be.  If I can find something that I believe in, I will lead it into battle if I have to.  Are you a leader?  Do you value yourself?

Today I am Thankful

What is it about the first day of the month?  It's a fresh new month and I am filled with ambition to do something new and exciting.  Let's make some changes!  Why wait for the new year, why not now?  You know what I'm talking about.  The excitement lasts a couple days and we're back to our day to day boredom.  I say let's make that change.

November is the month that we have Thanksgiving.  I had an idea this morning that I messaged my boyfriend about.  Let's be thankful everyday.  At dinnertime each night, lets share something that we are thankful for.  Who wants to join me?  If you've taken a moment to read this blog, then why don't you join me?  Go to our Facebook page and join us.

This is your life, what are you thankful for?  I intend to take some time in the morning with myself and focus on what I'm thankful for.  Please join me and share what you're thankful for!

Leadership Points to Ponder

I have found a new book that I LOVE!  It is 40 Leadership Nuggets to Live by ~ By Stephen I Nellas

I am not a reader.  I have always disliked reading and can't seem to focus on the words because my mind is running wild.  I'm not sure what happened.  Ever since I got my Kindle, I have become a reader!  I love it!  This is my latest find and I wanted to share some of the amazing things that I have found in this book.

First and foremost, his first nugget is about doing what you are asking people to do.  My ex-husband was in the car business for most of the 17 years that we were together.  I know what you're thinking... a car salesman... YUCK.  Well, he was one of those people that you just trusted and he was known for getting you a good fair deal, so he did pretty well for himself.  One of the things that he claimed was a reason for his success as he managed others was that he didn't ask anyone to do anything that he wasn't willing to do himself.  Enough about him and back to the book.

A leader is first and foremost a follower. ~ Stephen I. Nellas

The first thing that he follows is his own word; he practices what he preaches.  Following is always a trait of great leaders.  The leader will not ask anyone to do anything he will not do himself.  He is a person who values the principles of obedience and humility.  He knows that there are people who are genuinely better than he is, and he knows that he is also better than other people in specific things.  (Nellas, S. I. (2012). 40 Leadership Nuggets of Wisdom to Live By)

Who do you follow?

Do you follow them because you respect them?  Or because you fear them?

Are people following you?